So, you’re interested in this girl, right? Man, she’s a cutie! You’re super nice to her, and hey, maybe you’re even spending a little money on her - maybe you’re spending a lot of money on her! She’s gonna love it. But oh no - she either has a significant other already, or gets one all of a sudden, leaving you in the dust! What the fuck?? You are so “”friendzoned”“, bro.
You know why that’s not true? Because someone isn’t obligated to return your romantic attraction just because you’ve been kind to them or lauded them with gifts and affection. What if one of your friends did this to you, and you had absolutely no interest in them at all? How would you feel if they grew bitter and angry about this, as if your friendship wasn’t good enough? Wouldn’t that make you uncomfortable - maybe even a little pissed off? I bet it would!
People aren’t machines that you feed currency into until they’re ready to date you. That’s not how the world works. If you get turned down by someone you’re interested in, “despite” you being nice and spending your time and money on them, it doesn’t mean they’re a shitty person. Nobody is obligated to date anyone, ever.
Being rejected sucks, especially when you really like someone. I know, it’s happened to me several times! It’s not the end of the world, though, and holding a grudge or feeling slighted over it isn’t going to change the situation - it’s just going to make you look like kind of an asshole.
So ease your foot off the gas of your ragemachine, think about the situation a little. Reflect on it. Appreciate the friendship you have and assess your priorities and actions. Above all else, please don’t act like a douche. The other person probably doesn’t deserve it.
“Women are expected to be nice and sweet, to make other people feel comfortable. A woman who says ‘hey, I think there’s a problem here’ is being ‘negative.’ A woman who doesn’t smile while she’s being harassed is ‘humourless.’ A woman who prefers to stay focused on tasks is a ‘cold bitch.’ Significant gendering is involved here; women have an obligation to look and act a certain way and when they don’t, they need to be hassled until they do.”—Unknown (via grrl-meat)
The above article is an update. Her mother went to appeal to keep her out of the psychiatric ward and lost. She will be institutionalized because of her expression of her gender. She will be held until she conforms to male gender and then released to foster care, not her mother who was supporting her.
Please, if you haven’t signed the petition, sign it, reblog it, ask your friends to sign it. We’ve managed to get 40K signatures for a pageant model, we’ve only gotten 11K for a little girl about to have her life ruined. Lets get on the ball and spread the word.
I’ve sent an email to the original calming manatee people. Haven’t heard back yet, but hopefully they’ll be cool with it.
I am seriously so stoked that so many people were happy with what I did. From the notes I’ve seen, at least twenty said it made their day, ten said it gave them confidence to get through the rest of their day and a hundred dang people said it made them feel better about themselves.
I did something that made people happy. And I know it’s super dumb, because “this is the internet” and it wasn’t my idea in the first pace but….